Partake - A Year of PG or Less

My one word for 2018 (in place of New Year's resolutions) was Partake.  I expected my year to be focused on truly monitoring what I let into my soul - body and spirit.  Filtering out the bad, inviting more of the good.

I'd say I had moderate success.  I didn't do well with the physical.  I didn't do well cleaning up my diet and focusing on other healthy behaviors I've let slip (like sleep and water).

I didn't do well on time management.  I didn't cut down significantly on Netflix and such.

However, I did really well at filtering out the entertainment that doesn't fit my value system.  There are books, TV shows, movies, and music I partook of before that I wouldn't really want to admit to.  Not because the world considers them inappropriate, but because I do.  They were the literal definition of guilty pleasures.

The simplest way I found to bring my behaviors and beliefs into accord was to cut out all entertainment that would be rated higher than PG.

Not everything is rated.  Books aren't rated, but many of them would be beyond PG if they were.  Music isn't screened well at all.  Old movies are often not rated.

With music, I just cut out anything with swearing or sex.  With everything else, whenever I found myself wanting to partake of something that wasn't rated, I did a little homework.

With books, I asked the people who read them, if I could.  Right now I only read for book club, so I just asked someone who read ahead of me.  That worked well.  I only had to filter one or two of them out.

I used IMDb to judge movies and TV shows.  If a show didn't seem to have a rating, I scrolled down to a section called Certificate and clicked on See all certifications.  This showed me how it was rated in other countries.  I looked at the ratings from Australia and the United Kingdom, sometimes others.  If they were under 13, I called it approved.  I also read the Parents Guide.  These helped a lot.

The trouble came when IMDb and Netflix had conflicting ratings.  Like with Merlin.  On IMDb it's TV-PG; on Netflix it's TV-14.  I watched many episodes before I found out it was TV-14 on Netflix.  Then I pondered a long time.  It's a series I've watched a couple times.  As far as I could guess, the only thing that might push it to TV-14 is the witchcraft, that gets a little more intense in the later seasons.  But it still wasn't something that went beyond my sensitivities.  In the end, I stopped watching it.  Not because I don't think it's okay for me, but because it was my goal to not watch beyond PG for the year, and I wanted to stay as true to that as I could.

There were a lot of shows that are TV-14 that I think are okay, but I didn't watch.  There were also some that were PG that I wasn't okay with, like Charmed (lots of casual sex).  Luckily, I had many options I love - like all the Star Treks (except Discovery, which . . . let's just not go there) and Doctor Who.  Most SciFi TV before 2000 is fine.  I also watched some shows from years ago that I didn't watch when they first aired, like Sabrina the Teenage Witch.  And I explored a lot of teen and kids shows and found some gems, like Wolfblood and Gravity Falls.

It was a little tough at the beginning of the year.  I wasn't watching R-rated or TV-MA before anyway, so it wasn't a huge jump.  But once in a while I'd want to watch something I thought was okay and find it wasn't.  And it was tough when the new Fantastic Beasts came out and was rated PG-13.  And it was especially tough during Octoboween, when I usually watch Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Angel, both beyond my limit.

But, overall, it was a great year.  I was happier.  My soul was lighter.  I felt more clean.  And less self-reproaching.  I'm really glad I did it and that I stuck to it.

I've been debating how I want things to change or stay the same now that the year is over.  I've decided I'll mostly maintain my current status.  I'll mostly stay away from PG-13 and TV-14, unless it's something I know is clean.  I have a much better knowledge of what I'm sensitive to now and feel I can be honest with myself and take care of myself by filtering accordingly.

I watched my first TV-14 show yesterday - The West Wing.  There was a bit more swearing than I remember, but I think it was just the episodes I chose.  I'm going to give it a few more tries before I write it off again.  And I WILL be seeing Fantastic Beasts: The Crimes of Grindelwald before too long.

Beyond that, I just don't know yet.  I've learned a lot.  I'll play it by ear - or by heart, I guess.

2018 One Word - Partake

Choosing one word for the year is an interesting thing.  I always think I know how it will play out, but it always surprises me.  I'm sure this will be the same.

It often starts with a feeling.  I get a sense of what I need to focus on.  Sometimes a clear word.  Sometimes just an ethereal idea.  After pondering on it for a while, usually several days, I settle on the word.  Always a bit before the end of the year.  I've known my word for next year for a few weeks now.

And when I choose a new word, I tend to start changing my life to fit it, even before January first.  Can't help it.

This year's word is PARTAKE.  As usual, I have a very clear feel for what it will be, even if I can't quite say it. 

The first word that came to mind was consume, then consumption.  It was an idea that I needed to be more aware of what I take into my mind and body.  Consume was so completely not the right word, and consumption made me feel like I was in the 1800s with some disease.  I had to work on it for a bit.

But partake is so totally the right word.  It's not about devouring something.  It's about accepting something.  It has a spiritual feel to it.  It helped me flesh out my view for the year.

It's both about not partaking in something unhealthy for me and choosing to partake of things that are.  The duality of that might not be obvious.  But I can choose not to partake of certain negative things and go on my merry way without too much change.  When I'm presented with good options/opportunities, I need to partake of those.

See?  It's totally clear in my heart but tough to communicate.

I've already started to prepare and to put it into practice.  It's very compelling, this year's word.

In a simple and obvious way, I've whittled down my viewing and music choices.  I already leaned on the less adult side.  I already limited my movies to PG-13 and my TV to TV-14.  This cut out so much objectionable stuff.  (For me.  Let me be clear - this is about my tolerance, not a judgment on anyone else.)  But there's still so much that I'm not proud of, that I know isn't good for me, but I was hesitant to get rid of because I like it.

I've gone through Netflix (where I do almost all my viewing) and cleared everything from my queue that's rated more than PG.  I've also cut out some things that are PG but with content I know isn't in accordance with this plan.

I've created a new music playlist without swearing and without sex.  I already had a pretty clean selection, but once in a while I had a song I wouldn't play around other people's children.  I figure that's a pretty good indicator.

These seemed to be a good place to start, easy to discern. 

I tend to be porous, picking up on the emotions of people around me.  Not just aware of them, but carrying them, whether I want to or not.  Until now, I didn't make the connection that I have that same experience with the media I partake of.  It soaks into me in much the same way, whether I want it to or not.  I believe these changes will help lighten my soul.

But it's not just about making better choices about what I consume.  It's also about how much.  And when.  And so many other things.

And as I've begun to put it into motion, without really trying, I've found interesting thoughts cross my mind.  When I was disappointed with something and wanted to be critical, I paused.  We live in a society that seems to relish complaints, criticism, and sarcasm.  They're easy to throw around.  But when I paused I heard these words in my mind - "Partake of positivity."

I found it very intriguing.  When I stop myself from complaining or criticizing, I've always thought of it as an outward thing.  I'm doing this to them, for them.  I'm stopping negative feelings and expression from leaving me and going to the other person.  But in that moment I saw it from a different perspective.  Partaking of positivity, inviting that into my heart, stops the rest.  It strengthens me, lifts me.  It's not that I stop myself from saying or doing anything negative, because that just goes away.  It's just gone.

I know I'm not explaining this very well.  It makes sense to me.  I hope it makes a little sense to you.  And I hope I can observe and document it a bit better this year, so I can share it with you as I go along.

Do you have a word for 2018?