I'm sorry to be so crass. I could sugar coat it. I could say that mornings aren't my favorite time of day. That they are a struggle. But it wouldn't change the fact that mornings suck! And I mean bad!
I hear people talk about the joy of watching the sunrise. I hear people talk about that blissful time in the house when they are the only ones up, private time to enjoy before they wake everyone else. I hear people talk about being so grateful for another day. Welcoming it with excitement and vigor.
I hate these people; they're so irritating.
These are the people who schedule early morning games for my children ON SATURDAYS! These are the people who decided that my kids should start school at 7:30 a.m. -- even though studies show that children aren't really awake enough to learn productively at that time of day. And can't you just hear some snotty, bright-eyed morning person saying, "The early bird gets the worm," with that big, I've-been-up-since-five grin on their face?
Well, maybe that's true. Maybe the early bird does get the worm. But I stay up late and I get cookies. Which would you rather have?
I can enjoy the quiet time, when I'm the only one awake, at two in the morning. I can watch whatever I want on hulu without interruption from my sleeping family. I can be grateful that another day is over and I didn't kill anyone. I can revel in my internal rebellion against the clock of modern society.
I haven't always been comfortable this way. I tried to conform. Especially while living with my father, who has always gotten up at 4:00 a.m. without need of an alarm clock.
But I'm a grown up now. Or at least, a legal adult. I get to decide when to go to bed.
If only I could really decide when to get up. I still have kids who are school age, who still haven't mastered the art of getting up and out the door without me.
But there will come a day. There will come a day when I don't use an alarm clock. When I sleep until my body tells me to get up. When I finally feel rested.
Okay, I may be delusional, but it gets me through. I have to keep believing that there's beautiful darkness and quiet at the end of the tunnel.
Until then, mornings will continue to suck.