Activity 1: Write a letter to a friend as if she is sitting beside you. How is this writing different from your blog posts?
This prompt immediately brought to mind an incident from high school. A time when my life was in flux and I chose to exclude a friend. I did not get the chance to resolve it then; I would like to address it now.
What would I say to you if you were here now? I have regretted my decision for so long, but I don't know if I could find the words. I don't know if I could even speak. I think I would have difficulty looking at you because of my shame.
The guilt of our decision, our pact, was weighing heavily on me. I couldn't keep silent any longer. I couldn't keep lying. I knew I needed to tell the truth.
But I should have talked to you before I did so. Instead, I hung you out to dry.
Why didn't I talk to you first? I'm not sure. I think maybe I was afraid. I was afraid you would get angry with me. I was afraid you would disagree and talk me out of it. I was afraid I was too weak to stand up to you.
And I was selfish. I was more worried about clearing my conscience than protecting my friend.
I don't know how we lost each other so quickly. One minute we were inseperable. The next minute you were gone.
I have searched for you. I have watched for you. I think of you often, and my heart is filled with regret.
I may never see you again. I may never have the opportunity to make things right.
But if you were here now, I would tell you that I am so very, very sorry.